This Christmas really does seem to be a perfect time to (re)train ourselves in the art of patience and surrender.

The song, Little Drummer Boy has been ringing in my ears and in my heart these past few weeks. I am a traditional Christmas music listener, so this ballad has never really been on my radar until this year. Although I am learning to embrace “different” and “new” – there might have been a drummer boy at the manger that night… in my house there are Barbies and nutcrackers paying homage to the newborn king. As I go throughout my day, cooking, cleaning, sweeping up the needles from underneath my tree for the 10^th time, I continue to hear the words… “I played my best for him…” Those words are like a sip of steaming hot chocolate warming my weary soul.

2020 has been a hot mess. The year of “no.” A year without sensible explanation, strewn with disappointments, unseen letdowns and growing challenges. Mothers and fathers turned teachers, living rooms turned into offices, with an increase in laundry and a decrease in game plan.  But we have done our best.

“Come they told me
Pa rum pum pum pum

A new born king to see
Pa rum pum pum pum..”

We just returned from a trip to my hometown of Philadelphia, where our yearly Christmas adventures usually start at sunup and finish after sundown. But not this year. In fact, we were forced to cross state lines to find indoor dining for our traditional family breakfast at IHOP. This continual change, day to day, has truly forced us to toss original goals and ideas straight out the window. To a type-A planner, this has really done a number on my psyche. I have a perpetual debate in my head each morning as I rise…one voice telling me to just stay in bed and watch movies because there’s nothing in my day I can control…and another fighting for my attention saying that there’s more to my day than checking boxes and a keeping a perfect kitchen. There’s more to Christmas…

Our finest gifts we bring
Pa rum pum pum pum

To lay before the king
Pa rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum

This Christmas can be a time to free ourselves from the stresses and expectations of perfection and production. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to quite dial down my habitual “yes” to  celebrations, events, or gatherings but this year- the choice has been made for me. I’m starting to see there’s another kind of affirmation we could agree to…

I have no gift to bring
Pa rum pum pum pum
That’s fit to give our king
Pa rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum

What can we do? Where can we go? It’s a little place called Bethlehem. In a cold, dark stable…There is a woman who understands. She had plans. She had dreams. And she was given some news that changed everything. Her reply? An unwavering, faith-filled nod. And surrender of it all…without so much as an idea of what was to come. But she didn’t have to know…

I heard a sermon by Bishop Barron from Word on Fire that explained our vision of God’s work on earth like walking into an artist’s studio. Brushes deep in paint, remnants often sprinkled on the floor, canvases in every corner of the room- backgrounds with deep hues and pastels.  Piles of clay, somewhat shaped but unrecognizable…To us- a mess. To the artist- He’s just getting started.

Shall I play for you
Pa rum pum pum pum
Pa rum pum pum
Pum pum pum pum

Mary nodded
Pa rum pum pum pum

Could we approach this Christmas with an outlook on Hope, and gifts greater than underneath a tree? There is a tapestry being woven, and we are not yet to see the other side. Go to the stable, bring all that you are. Bring your sadnesses and disappointments. Lay them down…and maybe, little by little- open your hands to the possibility of newfound Joy?

I played my drum for him
Pa rum pum pum pum
I played my best for him
Pa rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum

Let us be comforted by the last words of this sweet song…

Then he smiled at me
Pa rum pum pum pum
Me and my drum

I pray you find peace, joy, and an abundance of Hope this Christmas. It might not be what we planned, but it can be more. Find strength in Mary and the Little Drummer Boy who leaned in with their gift of unquestionable faith- giving all they had. It only takes Just One “Yes.”